Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children

** - It’s a bad sign if one continually asks oneself things like “who is this guy?” and “what the hell is going on?” while watching a movie. This is something that I find to be a frequent occurrence when watching anything animated that originates in Japan, and “Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children” certainly fits that bill. The Final Fantasy franchise is apparently quite the phenomenon in its native Japan, spawning something like 20 video games, several animated series, action figure lines, apparel, and two super-advanced CG films based on the seventh video game installment, the movie reviewed here being the second of those. I saw the first one a while back, and was not overly impressed, and this follow-up is both more boring and more confusing. The only things about it that were more confusing than the plot were the fight scenes, which were exceedingly choppy and very hard to follow. The film seems to assume that the viewer knows who all the people who show up in it are, and doesn’t provide any explanation of who these characters are, what their motivations are, or why all the guys look super woman-y and have weird spiky haircuts and carry swords that are twice the length of their bodies. It might be worth a look for the animation - which is admittedly excellent - but the story makes no sense and if you are able to follow what the hell is going on you deserve some kind of award.

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